I specialize in trauma-informed couples therapy, addressing betrayal trauma and attachment wounds within current relationships, as well as the impact of childhood and past trauma on attachment and relationship satisfaction. I am an eclectic therapist and draw from different theories. In couples therapy I tend to rely on emotion focused therapy, the Gottman method, and relational life therapy.
Couples I work with:
Are at all stages of their relationship: dating, engaged, married, separated, or divorced
Are at many different life stages
Often have a history of childhood, interpersonal, or betrayal trauma
Are often struggling to overcome a deep betrayal like abuse, an affair, a lie, or a big secret
Often need help managing conflict in a way that allows both people to feel heard and respected
May need help recognizing how trauma has impacted their lives and relationships and how to manage triggers, sensitivity, and emotions
Often have differences in sexual desire, fantasies, and openness
May lack support from extended family on one or both sides due to conflict, estrangement, cultural differences, or moving far from their support system
Frequently have conflict over mismatched attachment patterns. For example, one person needs a lot of space and the other person needs a lot of closeness
Are often navigating major life transitions like getting married, having a baby, having a child leave home, losing a parent, having a major health issue, or losing a job
May have difficulty managing major differences in viewpoints on lots of issues, like money, religion, relationship with extended family, parenting,etc
Often have different cultural backgrounds and family backgrounds that create differing expectations in gender roles, family boundaries, and more
Frequently are navigating blended families
Therapy can help you…
Rebuild Trust
Betrayal trauma, childhood trauma and interpersonal trauma can all cause significant problems in romantic relationships, because all of these experiences teach us that other people are not safe to trust or be close to. After having been betrayed by someone we should have been able to trust the most, it is normal to be scared to reconnect, and the experience creates deep wounds. Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) or Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, depression, anxiety, hypervigilance, trust issues, chronic pain, nightmares, anger, shame, fear, resentment, and other complex emotions are normal. It’s normal to have avoided facing the betrayal as a way of protecting yourself, and it’s normal to take extreme measures to try and protect yourself from the feelings by escaping through unhealthy coping mechanisms. Therapy provides a supportive space to process these emotions, repair trust, and rebuild your relationship. Seeking therapy is a brave step that shows your commitment to face difficult issues and grow together.
Reconnect with Your Partner
Many couples drift apart due to busy schedules, life transitions, or unresolved tension, while others feel isolated because of patterns of avoidance, negativity, or resentment. Whatever has made you feel disconnected, I can help you work through these issues and rebuild a warm, loving connection with your partner.
Manage Triggers and Conflict in Healthier Ways
It’s common to struggle with managing emotions during conflict, especially when past trauma is involved. We can work to help you understand and manage your triggers, break out of unhelpful conflict cycles, and learn healthier ways to handle disagreements. Conflict doesn’t have to be hostile or push you further apart. Together, we’ll work on tools to navigate conflict constructively, helping you and your partner deepen your understanding of each other instead of growing further apart.
Establish a Deeper, More Intimate Connection
When partners feel safe to share their inner thoughts, feelings, and needs, true intimacy can grow and thrive. By practicing vulnerability, building trust, and becoming better listeners, you can establish a deeper, more satisfying connection—both emotionally and physically.
Navigate Difficult Transitions
Big life transitions—such as getting married, raising children, managing illness, or adjusting to an empty nest—can put significant stress on a relationship. I can help you navigate these changes by improving your communication and problem-solving skills so you emerge stronger and more connected.
Negotiate Boundaries with Extended Family
Conflict with young children, teens, adult children, in-laws, or extended family can create stress and division in a relationship. Whether you’re dealing with holiday expectations, financial decisions, sharing private information, or parenting styles, I can help you and your partner develop a shared vision, setting healthy boundaries with family members to reduce stress and increase unity.
Build a Shared Vision for the Future
Every couple brings a unique set of strengths and challenges into their relationship. We all have triggers and deeply held beliefs that we want to be honored, and it can be very complex to meet both people’s needs. Together we can help you communicate what you need and listen to what your partner needs so that you can have a peaceful and loving relationship where everyone is fulfilled and intimacy grows.
Take the Next Step Toward Healing and Connection
If you're ready to repair your relationship, build intimacy, and create a lasting bond, I’m here to guide you. Together, we’ll develop the tools you need to heal from the past, resolve conflict, and build a secure, loving connection.